Summer Conventions '97
It's Easter Sunday. It's a Unitarian Church. It Must be Time for the Sacred Recycling Celebration.
By Fred Wooden

At the 1997 General Assembly of the Unitarian Universalist Association, the denomination's Commission on Appraisal presented its report in the form of a skit. This tongue-in-cheek portion of the skit describes a "typical" UU congregation. The commission went on to conclude that Unitarian Universalists have acquired "quiet orthodoxies that shut people out as surely as doctrines or rituals. . . . Our report believes that the remedy lies not in changing what we are, but recovering the [denomination's] original vision, a religious community of autonomous congregations."

(Person at other rostrum, talking to a congregation on Sunday morning.)

BW: Welcome to the Unitarian Universalist Community of Misty Hills. I'm Rev. Bluebird, but everyone calls me Barney. It's Palm Sunday, which is important to Christians, but for us it means it's time for flower communion (which is the only communion Unitarian Universalists believe in). After the service please join us for our annual Vernal Equinox Potluck Passover barbecue. Are there any announcements?

LP: Thanks, Barney. I'm Patty Cake, president of the congregation. I'm also chair of the New Democratic Club, which will meet during the service. We all know you don't have to go to church to be a Unitarian Universalist, right, Barney? (Chuckles all around.) Following the service, the Amigos de Tierra will meet to plan the Easter Sunday Sacred Recycling Celebration. Also, don't forget to listen to the part 17 of the Story of Particle Physics on "Some Things Considered" tonight. We'll meet to discuss it at Cyberperk at 7:30. Petitioner's Anonymous will meet tomorrow in the Xerox room. And now, here's Pete Skinflint to talk about the Canvass.

GR: Thanks, Patty. Well, here we are again. Just like last year we are looking at a budget shortfall. And since we don't believe in guilt, there's no way we can force you to give more money (heh-heh). This is a free church, after all, and you decide what you're willing to give. No one can tell you what to do or how much to give. Besides, we all have other causes we support, and you know, it's a Unitarian Universalist tradition . . . (Trails off, forgetting what he was going to say.) If some of you could do a little better, we might not have give up free coffee. (Commission members reach quickly into pockets and provide money for the collection.)

DR: Hi. I'm Sara Morningstar Winterspring, Director of Education and convener of the Women's Spirituality Circle. I just want to remind you that this year the ABC-UUWF will be holding their convo at Lackawanna B&B. I also want to say that the RE-COM will be meeting with the Fin-Com to plan for the GA. Two from our YRUU is going to Con-Con this year. If you would like more info, contact me or the DA Chair, who will be in the Sojourner Truth Alcove after the coffee hour.

KB: By the way, the membership committee will be recognizing new members next week. If you want to join, the membership book is beside the water fountain, next to the guest book. They're both blue, but the membership book has a green pen. If you sign, let them know.

Reprinted with permission of the Unitarian Universalist Assocation.

Related Links

Commission on Appraisal Presentation (1997)

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